need title
by CHAOS
Summary: Johnny comes back after his little trip (this is just a boringopening. Chaper one comming up later) r&r...please?
1. Default Chapter

  
Diclaimer: blah blah blah. (c) Jhonen Vasquez.  
  
Warning: I am a terrible writer. Truly, I am. Grammer wise, yes, but as in going into character of Johnny & such...I am disgusting. But oh well! Oh, by the way, this is just a boring opening. I'm gonna do chapter one after this.....so...OH YEAH!! I MIGHT make fancomic out of this story, so if I do, I am more likely to post this up at my fansite dedicated to Mr. Johnen at:  
http://www.envy.nu/nepenthes  
  
Note: this takes place after Vol. 7. When he comes back & stuff.  
  
Okay, I go now.  
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[ o p E n Ing'. ?  
  
  
  
The woods creaked as he walked upon it. Of course it shoud creak. But it was a fisrt sound made ever since he came back. Nothing but the thick shadows of the wintery night filled the room for the eyes, but he knew where to walk upon. He knew.....  
  
A material foreign to the area was dropped from the crookedly thin fingers, as it bounced lightly on the wooden floor, with sweet red liquid seeping out from the mouth of the papery cup. The night was still, as he always remembered, walking over to the window where the boards were unevenly nailed to. The stars were slightly visible between the boards, but he hesitated to gaze them. He was afraid that he might see things same again...no changes toward "better". Or maybe to "worse".  
  
By the time his fingers managed to find their way to the light's switch, he dissapointedly found himself stepping away from the window. Letting the light tangle with the dark, pushing them out completely, he walked over to a chair, painted in chipped black paint. Few words and pictured were forcefully scrubbled with a pen or nails onto the chair's dry wooden surface, as he remembered. Not reallly caring to get himself comfortable, he picked up a thin nail that was on the floor, under the chair and started to cuve out a small doodle on its arm rest.  
  
"Happy. Happy. Happy. Happy. Happy...."  
  
By the time he tossed the nail onto a wall, the arm rest was full of those words. But he still didn't feel "happy".   
  
What day is today, anyway? Funny how he forgot to shiver like mad and snot out some crap form his nose. Last time he remebered checking up on the day was the last time he had written on his diary. That was somewhere around December.  
  
"Oh yeah...December 15th."  
  
Month of Christmas, where they say Jesus (read it in Spanishy way) was born. It wasn't like he hated Christmas like Scrooge, or that green guy...who was it? Oh yeah, the Grinch. It's not the fact he hated how people ran around happy, gathering around a huge tree with everyone in the town, singing together as they held hands with stranegers...cuz they don't, anyway. That was the reality. It just that, he wished that was true. So true, so real. It be funny......especially if he came to join them.  
  
As he sat there quietly, he started to wonder what ever happened to that little guy? Um....Squee? He turned his head gently over to the window, squinting his eyes to his neighbor's. No light. He must be asleep by now. He pushed himeslf up from the chair, but then his body slumped back down. Maybe not tonight...no. He just might find himself hugging that boy if he see him now. He need to meet someone before that. Someone who will irritate him to get him warmed up again to kill and refresh his mind. Yes...that be good. Kill...maybe this time, he should go see a fat Italian cook over at some resturaunt and make him sing those nice Italian song that goes with spagetti and pop his tommy like balloon. It be kinda halerious if it does pop. His lips trembled into a smile, starting to stand up, his mind already going toward his idea. Yes...now he knows what he wants to do.   
  
"I'm gonna get me some Brain Freezy."  
  
Yeah, good idea. Good idea indeed.  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. chapter one

Disclaimer: (c) Jhonen V.  
  
Warning: sucks. Very much..boring....you know, the usual.  
  
Note: I tried? Chapter 2 will come up after this, too. I'm sorry....HEY! WAIT A SEC! I just found out that my opening for this fanfic had 666 words! Whoa...I dunno bout you, but I am utterly amazed! Heehee~!  
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cHAPte r - Onnnnnnnnne  
  
  
  
The shadow was merged onto a wall down below, as the door leading to the basement opened, letting the first light of this season beam against it. The shadow seemed to dance like a broken puppet on a string on the crumbling wall, as Johnny made his way down the stairs. Everything was silent. The silence of silence seemed to hit the musky air since he came back to his home. When he got to the small basement, the first floor of the underground room, he started onto another room, climbing lower and lower and lower and lower and lower, and......  
  
Those fingers curved against the corner of one of the darkest, biggest, and lowest room of the basement. One-and-a-half blood shot eyes creeped over the dark corner along with the fingers with him, peeking into the dark room. Even though only small portion of his face, covered with shadows were showing from the corner, it was funny how his maddening smile was so vivid, even in the dark.  
  
"Just as I left you," he croaked, stepping in carefully, yet casually. "You've always were my amusement...okay, so I kinda lie when I say this, since I really careless what you can show me...your insides, but I saved you, just for one particular occasion. With others, I just couldn't wait to bash their rib cages, tear them open like some note book and scribble out my thoughts and lectures into their squishy things inside. It's really hard trying to make a violin out of their guts."  
  
He walked around a tiny, plump figure that sat in the middle of the room, studying it carefully, as he held something heavy and metalic behind his back. He continued on yapping as he did, for few more minutes (I could type all those, but too lazy to think and type at the same time), then paused, looking back down at the round helpless figure.  
  
"I'm glad I saved you, though, little piggy. You were very useful to me, till today. Today, I REALLY need you. For you SEE? I need something very, very badly. Ever since I went onto a little trip of mine, I expected something nice and dandy. A change. Any kind of change. I came to a point where I didn't care if it went to a worse, to flat shit, as long as something, ANYTHING changed in my life. But did it...NO!! Coming back just made things more dense. And I'm not really in the mood to do anything right now, eventhough I feel like doing things right now. But before I do that, I want to 'refresh' myself a bit. And I know what makes me feel a bit better (sometimes) when I feel like I've just been crapped out that was already digested."  
  
He then, slowly held up a long stick with a huge chunk of metal at the tip, then looked down onto the figure...a tiny little piggy bank.  
  
"CHERRY FREEZY! CHERRY FREEZY!!"  
  
He yelled out from his lungs, laughing as his eyes went somewhere. The huge cracked hammer crashed against the clay piggy bank, then continued on smashing. Over and over and over and over.....The floor underneath started to crack, but he kept on laughing, until he coughed out for breath. He weezed with one eye twitching, then relaxed himeslf as he dropped the hammer. Then he knelt down, picking up the busted pieces of the piggy bank as he started to look for any sign on money.  
  
....where's the money?  
  
"Where's the money?"  
  
He stood up with dazed look on his face, gazing into the empty space as he questioned. This just doesn't make any sense. He remembered how he saved few money into a piggy bang just for the fun of it, to feel a bit normal, and maybe fore the "just incase" if he needed some money for any emergencies when he's out of change.   
  
"FFFFFffffFFFFFUCK! WHERE THE HELL IS THE MONEY?!"  
  
He twisted himself, turning to the stairs that lead up to a floor above. Not really knowing what he was doing, he slammed open a door to anothr room, much smaller then the last one, and stormed right up to a wall, where a man who was hanging against it (Made him eat his own waste & such to live on before he left).  
  
"FEW MONTHS AGO!!! I found this little piggy piggy....it was my 'life saving'. I been saving money little by little into that little piggy bank, until tonight. I wanted cherry freezy...until I found no money in there...."  
  
He started to walk toward the man closer, as the man's eyes widened, dispite his sickness that he was going through for weeks. Unhumanly stench aroused from the man, but it seemed to not bother Johnny that much. Not at this state of mind. The man started to tremble, the chains stripped around his wrists started to tighten around them again.  
  
"OH GOD! Oh...oh GOD!! OH FUCKIN' GAWD!" the man started to scream, kicking the floor as he pushed himself more against the wall. "I thought you left! I thought you left!!"  
  
"Oh well, I came back." He eyed the man, looking down to a twisted fork that he made the man use to scoop up whatever he can for food. Something disgusting was stuck between the points, but he didn't care, taking the fork into his gloved hand and waved it at the man.  
"And this is what I get as a welcome back greeting? No money in the piggy bank!?"  
  
"Look, man! I dunno what you're talkin' about!" the bold figure started to slobber as he yelled, his voice trembling in his throat. "I...I.....what does this have to do with ME???! I didn't take the money! I didn't!!"  
  
"SILENCE!"   
  
Johnny swang the fork up, almost scraping up the man's eyes off and stepped backwards, glaring down at him while his back was arched in dusturbing way.  
  
"Do you remember why I even selected you, along with the rest of the filthy minded pretties? Do you even have the hint of the reason? Well, let me remind you. It was right before I had palnned to take the trip. You bumped into me and for soem reason, your hands were in my pocket. I thought you were actually some sick minded indivisual who craves for...for....," he paused, looking away as he played with the fork in his hand. "....until I realized that you were just trying to pick-pocket for my wallet. HA! At first, I kinda thought that was cute! The stupiditiness of it. But that really wasn't the point. THE POINT IS, you actually tried to steal from ME!?"  
  
He stepped forward again, pressing the points of the fork against the man's skin head and started to scribble on it, blood sripping from the lines that he made while the man started to scream.  
  
"And then this incident happens to me with the piggy! THE PIGGY!! And I just couldn't help but to get this image of you! SWILLING WITH GREED! I tried to elude my self from anything like that. I just hate to think about such things like this, and all those shit-filled select-people, but you just keep trying to bash yourself into my mind with this FORK!!?"  
  
"DUDE! What the hell are you TALKING ABOUT!? You're not makin' any sense, here! Even the readers thinks...."  
  
"Today, we shall start our lesson!"  
  
"WAI!T WAIT!! PLEASE, OH MY GOD! PLEASE! I dun wanna die! I'm really sorry for what I did! I swear, I'll never do that again! I swear!! If you want some money, just go through my wallet and use my credit card!"  
  
"Don't take me up as one of you. ....besides, that kinda takes up too much trouble for me."  
  
"Then....theen...take my teeth! YeAH! My gold teeth! It's...it's right here! Here!!"  
  
"I SAID!!!!"  
  
The maddened man swang the fork over to the man, who had his mouth wide open, trying to show him where his gold teeth were. The fork went straight into the mouth, stabbing the man into back of his throat. The mean screeched, blood splattering onto Johnny's face. Few seconds later, the man was still screeching. The crazed expression of Johnny softened into a wonder, his eyes going round as he placed a finger to his chin.  
  
"All that damage, and still alive? Hmm......"  
  
He just stood there for few moments, just staring down at the struggling man, then got tired of the waiting and the screaching.  
  
"Can't you...kinda turn down your volume?" he asked, a bit politely, but the man continued on with the pain.  
  
His expresion slowly twisted up again, as he brought his gloved hand over to the man's jaw, with one hand gripping onto the protruding fork's handle. As he wiggled the fork, he started to concentrate his strength on the jaw. When he heard a pop, he quickly pulled his gripping hand away, pulling off the jaw from the man violently, more blood pouring into the air. He found himself laughing in thrill and amazement. Or just felt like laughing. The man finally went quiet, slomping down onto the ground as Johnny continued to laugh.  
  
"HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!....HYAAAAAHA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA-.....wait a sec...."  
  
Pausing, with the jaw still in his hand, he scratched his head with bloodied gloved hand, then started to shrug lightly.  
  
"Oh yeahhhh....that's right. I took out the money out from piggy bank right before I left for the trip. Silly me."  
  
  
  
***  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
  
I think I need a job.  
  
  
  
  



	3. chapter three

Note: DAAAAAAMN! I wrote this most a-....MAZING chapters, EVER! And then I just had to be cute by losing the floppy! RAAAAAGE!!!!  
So this chapter has no point. No point at all. It's just randomness. Well, actually, I WAS going to put more into this chapter to make it less...pointless, but then i thought, "no". It'll be just too long, and no body lokes "too long".  
And it's boring. It boreds me.   
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chapter - 3  
  
So the snow wasn't coming down yet this day of the month, but damn, it was really freezy. Makes my little buttocks shiver, and your's too. So it was only natural for the convienient store to be full of people going for a nice cup of co-ffee, hot dogs, and all sorts of hot nummy-nummies.   
And see here! Johnny was there...or is going there, wearing no coats but a simple long sleeved shirt of his, that he's been wearing for 3 days straight, and a pants, that was wrinkled here and there, with his legs shivering in his boots. His whole body was shivering, actually, or maybe the wind was making his stickly body blowing around here and there, making him look like shivering. Or maybe both, yes, maybe both.  
Walking over the sticky parking lot, and into the convinient store, Johnny's skin frizzled up more with goosebumps at the sudden warming air inside. The lady at the counter stared at Johnny with an odd look, seeing how violently trembling he was, as if he was a walking seizure, with no decent clothes on to match the seasons. But see here? Well, he seemed to be smiling! Awww..... The lady thought maybe this jibbering jaggertash was happy to be able to get his hand on coffee, or to be out from..outside, but what surprised her was, that he was going over to the box of freezer, full of ice creams. Few other customers who was in line to pay for their goods, was starying over to Johnny as well, making weird faces and whispering.  
"Hey, son? Maybe it's a good idear to get you some of those yakets, huh?"  
But Johnny's attention was too deep into the freezer to hear the man talking over to him, who seemed nice enough to come up with concerned look. Those kind of look you give when you see a commercial, asking for donation for those poor starving kids at Africa.  
He shivered all the way as he searched deep into the box. His right hand was groping away the stacks on unorganized sorts of ice cream, while his left hand grasped onto the edges of the freezer, like a zombie's hand, grabing onto it's victems's leg from under its grave. The boney man mumbled frustratingly, but with a soft hum of a song as he now shoved up both of his hand, almost his whole body as he searched deeper into the freezer, the lady getting irritated at the fact he was doing this for unneccessrily long time, and knew some of the ice crea was starting to melt.   
AND THEN FINALLY, he found it. It. You know? I Scream, that little ice cream in a little cup, with a little facey screaming as if he's all foocked up about something, and whenever you buy that special kind of ice cream, you get to have a special kind of spoon that comes with it, with the screaming facey's picture at the tip of the cheap plasticky spoon. Johnny loved those spoon, and he used to collect them until he lost his collection of the spoon somewhere in his house, and got too depressed to recollect them again...until today. Today, he felt happy, as he practically skipped up to the counter, placing the cup before the lady, and started to dig into his pockets for money.   
While the chubby woman studied the unfamiliar ice cream, he started to pull out a dollar, two dimes, and four pennies. The woman have already told him it was goning to be a dollar twenty-five (for a small bit of ice cream like this), but he knew all too well of the price, and was struggling for the rest of the one cent. But all he got out of that searching was something small and gold. He pulled it out between his fingers, which was a crooked gold tooth that he faintly remember where he got that from...but hey, it was gold, and it was surely better than one cent, so he tossed it over the conter, taking the ice cream in hand, and smiled up to the lady as he waited for her to give him the special spoon.  
But there were these problems. One is that, this I Scream company is too small and close to out-of-business, how is she gonna know about the spoon? So of course, no one knew about the existance of such ice cream but Johnny, so they had no special-spoon laying around for this ice cream. And the second part is,  
"...what the hell is this?"  
The woman carefully looked down at the gold tooth, seeing a hint of something dry and brown at the lower bottom, then scrintched up her face in disgust as she stepped back a bit.  
"Gawd...don't tell me this is real! It ain't funny, boy, take that thing off of mah counter! If you can't pay for it, then leave the ah' scweam and get out!"  
Either this lady was just too strict, or can't seem to have fun...or are they the same? I don't know. But Johnny remained his smile-like curve on his lips, but his eyes started to wonder and question her. Is she not taking his pay? It was just a penny for god's sake, and surely a gold tooth can take the place! That's what they used to do alot of times back in the old days, far off to the southern part of the state, and she sure looked like she was from those days and those places.  
"...ummmm...."  
"GET THE FUCK OUT!"  
Wooow. She no look too happy. Even her flabby stomach seemed to scream out, with its folded fat looking all too much like her fatty lips. And he swore, Johnny did, that those folded fat of hers did open wide, screaming at him. There was no teeth, but when it opened it's "mouth" wide open, it tore her skin apart to show off her intestines like wiggling toungue, and her clotting fat and blood made a stringy line like spit. You know? When you open your mouth sometimes, the sticky spit stretches out like a string from top to bottom of your mouth, and if they are really thick and filmy, it's hard for them to snap. And thoes "spits" were the filmiest, most stickiest one of em' all. And when it did snap, some splattered onto Johnny's face, and his ice cream.  
As she continues flapping her flaps, his expression softened from happy-grin, to something not nice. His hand went over his angrily wrinkled face, wiping at nothing, or something invisible.  
  


+  
  


See, this little boy was smart.   
No, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying Johnny isn't smart. Actually, he is too smart, but this boy had just enough smartness...as of now. He wore his little jacket, with his little cute teddybear in his hand, and a bookybag hanging around his shoulder.   
See? A jacket? In winter time? Now that's smart...that's what I meant. Do you get this? No? Well...you're not smart, and me? Oh, okay...I'm not smart either.   
So, here he is, all fuzzy and warm still by the time he reached his house. He didn't take a glance to the neighboring house like he used to, not noticing much of a change, and went ahead inside.   
His room was nice and warm. The window was shut for a change, and he liked it that way. His room was filled with more posters and pictures now, the ones that he drew and made it himself, and today, he drew more pictures at school. He started to take out two sheets of paper, scribbled in so many different colors of Christmas. Squee knew all too well the holiday was coming knew....and like the kid he was, he was excited, yet dreaded it at the same time.  
He never got presents. Never. He's been always such a good boy, and after every Christmas with no presents passed by, he thought he was just being a bit not-enough-good, so he tried harder. However, no luck came still, and he always wondered to himself why he gets so excited anyway. It was more of a question how some kids, even the ones destined to be assholes, got presents from Santa Clause.   
Todd carelessly dropped his bag below the bed as he climbed onto it, pulling Shmee, his teddy bear, along with him. Shmee was full of stitches by this time, all over his body, but Todd loved it still. He waved his teddy around over his head with both of his hand holding it, laying on his back as he questioned.   
"Shmee, why won't Santa Clause ever come to my house?"  
The bear didn't answer him. All it did was stare back at the boy, with blank smile on its face, but Todd could remember the time when Shmee used to talk alot then all the other little teddy bears. Lately, Shmee's been awfully quiet, though, ever since Johnny have left for some personal trip of his.  
From the hall, through his open door, Todd froze as he heard a familiar foot steps dragging along from the kitchen, then was making itself to a room right across from his own. Todd hopped off from the bed, dragging along Shmee by his side, and poked his head out to see a man covered with the afternoon shadow with a huge mug of cold coffee in his hand.   
"Daddy?"  
The man froze on his steps, as if he just stepped on a nail with an annoying pain poking at his slippered feet.  
"...yes, son?" he sighed out his words.  
"How come Santa never bring me any presents?"  
"_Because,"_he replied, only his glasses gleaming white in the shadow as he still let only his back face his one and only son, "you've been a very naughty boy. Your sin was to be born. And we bought you so many toys so you can place all your attention to your toys then to annoy us. What more do you want?"  
Well, at least he didn't say "there ain't no such things at Santa Clause".  
Todd lowered his glance to the floor, squezing harder onto Shmee as the sound of the foot steps continued on, taking his father down the darker shadows of the hallway, and few moments later, a slamming of the door was heard. The boy said nothing as he stepped away from his open door, and slowly turned back to face his bed.  
"Hewwo, SQUEEEEEE!!"  
Todd almost jumped up with sudden surprise, making himself push over to the corner of his room.   
A round, plastick top with a screaming face was looking down to Todd as it danced in the air, and Todd could see a man behind it. His eyes went over to those twigly fingers that held onto the top, tracing over to its shaking arms, then up the shoulders, all the way to the face that he remembers all too well, and that made this worse...or better?  
Johnny seemed to be giggling under his breath, as he glanced around the room, then over to Todd as he studied the little boy.  
"I'm back," he stated the obvious, getting up from his crouched position, casting a shadow over Todd. It was odd the way how the shadow casted upon Todd by Johnny, even though the light wasn't coming from behind. Or maybe it's just Todd who was imagining things again.  
"And mmmmyyyy...you grew kinda taller then a remembered, and a wee-bit skinnier, too."  
The man pointed over to Todd, shivering still from the cold wind, but the window didn't seem like it was even bothered. Maybe he came from the different entrance again.  
Todd still looked up at him, as if Johnny were some kind of...terrible thing. Then his eyes wandered off to his clothing, where he can clearly see white and red specs, and even pink ones, too. The white specs looked like some kind of a cream, and it was all over his lips, too. The red ones seemed moist still, glistering on his shirt and hands, few on his face, and it smeared with some of those white cream, making it look like pink strawberry ice cream or something.  
But most of all, the red. It has to be blood (ah, no, duh), fresh from the oven.  
"So, Squeegly, what have you been up to while I was gone?"  
Todd still held onto Shmee like a shield, pushing himself harder against the corner. While Todd was doing just that, Johnny glanced around the room again, walking around as he pleased, then stopped at two pieces of payper lying below the bed, under the bookbag. He knelt over to pic them up, then glanced through the drawings of Santa and presents, and bloody knives, and all those cute normal things that was drawn onto the paper. He made a "mmhmm" noise as he did, then placed the paper on the bed as he stained the blankets by sitting onto it as well.  
"It's almost Christmas," Todd finally spoke up, stepping carefully over to Johnny.  
"I know," he replied.   
Todd stood there for another silence, then opened his mouth again with that huge eyes reflecting all too sadly.  
"Everybody gets presents from Santa Clause...except for me."  
Johnny looked down over to Todd, cocking his head in odd look.  
"I always try my best to be a good little boy, but still no presents. Daddy tells me that it's because I've been bad by being born, but I know he's just joking."  
"Yes, yes, the joke's really funnny. I am laughing. ...see me laugh?"  
Todd didn't say a word and placed himself onto the other side of the bed, taking the pictures in his hand. His hands twitched a bit for a while, as if he had this sudden urge to rip the papers and crumble them up, but before he did, Johnny took the pictures away from his tiny grasp (D'aw!), standing over to the window.  
"Oh, but this year, it'll be differnt."  
"Huh?"  
"This year, you're gonna get lots and lots of presents..."  
Johnny giggled at this, as if there was this funny inside joke at what he said, with his teeth flashing between his trembling grin, and that was really disturbing to Todd.  
"Well, Squee, I really wanted to chat and chat and chat, but something came up. Something nice, so I'll see you later..."  
Opening up the window, the skimmy man climbed over the edge of the window, giving him a final good bye-grin, and slipped out into the cold.  
Brrr!  
  


  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  



	4. chapter four

[chapter fucking four.]  
  
"Hmmm...."  
  
The newspaper was spread all over the floor, centering the man who sat on the creaking wooden floor. Newspapers weren't the only things that were scattered, though. There were crooked nails, little stuffed animals (real, and toy-ones), knives and other sharp objects, and so on. So on...because no one can't go on naming them all day long. But let us all focus on the newspapers now, mainly the one with job listings on them.  
  
In his hand, Johnny held onto a red marker with his eyes going round, scanning through the monochrome pages.  
  
"mmmmmm...."  
  
He keeps going over a page with the marker, circling one article, only to scribble them out, and go on to the other piece of the article, circling them. Before you know it, he was finished with that page, quickly flipping to another page as he almost ripped them.   
  
"Mmmmm...."  
  
He placed a finger to his chin, still trying to figure out what job will be best suited for him.  
  
Okay...will, there's plenty of fast food restaurants hiring anybody, anywhere, but the thought of it really didn't interest him that much. Okay, so he was more interested in taking up a job in Taco Smell, but for some reason (the minute they called the manager), they rejected him. Rejected him like a reject jellybean. He also had a mind about trying out for the local bookstore...where Devi worked, but he had a good idea that might not be a good idea. Part of him was scared to even go there, now.  
  
And it's been almost a week since he met Todd again, and he was close to sharing the newspapers with the homeless insane. If lucky, maybe a cardboard box. And daaamn! Was he hungry!  
  
Ogar need food.  
  
Ogar need money.   
  
Ogar no money have. Ogar RAGE! GRRRR! ARRRRGH!!!!  
  
And in such blinding rage, Ogar ripped off his shirt, showing off his hairy muscular chest of his, and swang off into the jungle, swinging on those vines....  
  
But anyway, by the time he came to the last page, he saw this cute little pictures of Santa Clause and little Elves. It was on a small article that hired anyone willing to work over at the mall, assisting the-...um. You know? Those people who dress up as a Santa Clause, sit on this chair while they let those kids sit on their laps and goggle out their wishes for Christmas Presents? Yeah, and it was asking for anyone who was nice enough to help organize that...thing stuff.   
  
"....mmm!"  
  
Johnny immediately circled that article with the red mark. Over, and over, and over again. This was the perfect place for Christmas job. A good, honest, decent job, and he figured he might get a good idea what little boys want for Christmas presents while working for Santa. He started to giggle at that thought, and then went ahead to look for the second job. And...um...my arms hurt. Really owie, so I'm going to skip that stuff about job finding. Anyway, in the end with that interviews and the training and crap, he ended up with a job over at some pizza place (who cares about the name) and that Santa thing. I'll call it.... Santa's Workshop of.... Love. Awww!  
  
Oh, okay, so anyway, the first day at that pizza kind of place was going fiiine. The training ended for Johnny already, and now he was in charge of chopping up the ingredients. If you say, "that's not what you start in the beginning of pizza-place-job-work thing!" I don't care. This is MY fanfic! …. Stupid.   
  
Going on, Johnny was in the middle of his work, chopping up the tomatoes. He hated cutting the tomatoes. It took him so much maddening self-control to keep himself from snapping out with the knife in hand, and the tomatoes just made things worse. But today was going really nicely for him as he hummed a tune, chopping up this and that and placing them in plastic boxes for others to use for the toppings. UNTIL…  
  
This guy came over, the pizza-making-guy, named Zeffy. He was one of the most disgusting man to come upon this pizza-place, but Johnny didn't pay much attention to him. As Johnny was now working on the mushrooms, Zeffy was munching onto a bread stick, looking over his shoulder as he made that annoying sound…  
  
Shmroo..Shmunch, mnch, mnch…  
  
That's the sound he made when he chewed on that damned bread stick. He munched, and chewed, and snorted at the same time. Not only that, he let his mouth hang open at every chew, breathing from his mouth and nose in that annoying way…really, really annoying. And he does such things, chewing, snorting, coughing, breathing and sucking all at once....AT THE SAME TIME! (DUH! DUH! DUUUUUURGHH!!!).  
  
HOW FUCKING ANNOYING!!   
  
The knife was flung down fast down upon a teeny-weenie (GIGGLE!) little piece of mushroom, and the blade of it sunk down into the board as Johnny kept his grip on the handle, just blankly glaring into space as Zeffy glanced toward him.  
  
"Wha a ell arewg oo dowing? Urry' up."  
  
His eyes twitched and widened as the sound of Zeffy's voice irritated him, so close to his ears, it made shivers of sickness crawl down to his spine...only to bounce back up again.  
  
"Wh-...," he breathes through his gritted teeth. Not only that, I think he was breathing through his whole pores that spotted all over his body just to keep himself intact of the maddening..madness thing. "Will you go away? You're really annoying. And very ronchi. It's just very vomitty to me." But Zeffy seemed to blink at that, stepping away as his hand grabbed onto Johnny's collar. Wow. He seemed offended. Johnny felt his heart beat "whoo!" in surprise as he was pulled toward to Zeffy's swinging fist and found himself flinging over the cold steel counter where he left his cutting board with the knife sticking from it.  
  
"....ow," he managed to say after he stood there for five seconds, backed at the corner with his cold hand touching his reddened side of his face, dented in a shape of a fist. Zeffy snored again, tossing his bread stick aside, and was mumbling something under his chewy-things. Maybe some kind of lecture he was managing to squeeze out from his horsey punk-accented lung of his while Johnny reached over to the knife that was still standing on the board. His glare seemed to twitch again and he swang the whole thing -the knife and the board- and let the edge of the board collide into the side of Zeffy's face.  
  
WOW! Isn't ANYBODY noticing this fight? Duh-ohwell!  
  
So when the board hit him, Zeffy was flung hard like Johnny, whith his tongue hanging out to the side until he hit the floor whith Johnny jumping up like a spider. His stickly legs flung over to each side, his hands snaking over in the air as he now landed on his chest, kneeling over Zeffy.   
  
"MR. WIGGLY!" screeched Johnny when he grabbed for the half bitten bread stick, which was limp enough to wiggle insanely in his grip. He let it wiggle, smiling, but his smile didn't go from side to side. It was in a knot, scruntched up to only one side with his teeth flashing darkly and his tongue wiggled in his mouth as he wiggled the bread, and started to stuff it into Zeffy's face. Zeffy started to muffle up with his yelling and cursing with his legs kicking. His arms started to grab hold of Johnny, tring to swing him off, but that seemed to not work. Now his spit started to suirt out into the air, hitting Johnny here and there, and that's just not clean.  
  
"If you like to chew on things like that," Johnny wheezed, forcing Zeffy's mouth open and took his skinny two fingers down his throat and pulled onto his tongue until it stuck out. "Chew on this!" Now he started to pump his jaws, up and down, making the crying man's teech chomp onto his own tongue. Blood and more drools splooshed out, and the man started to bubble. The tongue slowly started to go limp as it was being chews off and it flopped over into his mouth, choking him with his own blood at the same time.  
  
+++  
  
"Mooooommmmeeee!!!! MOOOOOMMMMEEEE!!"  
  
"I'm sorry, sweetie, but the pizza man just got lost on his way, but we got pizza now!"  
  
"WHEEE!!!"  
  
The whole family sat down around the TV, now starting up the movie as the mother placed down the pizza infront of her family. The movie started, and at the same time, her husband took up a slice of pizza and started to much on it.  
  
"...hmm....what kind of pizza is this, honey?" he asked, chewing on it as he glanced towards her.  
  
"I asked for pineapple and ham," she said, already hypnotized by the movie. Her husband coked his brows, glancing towards the pizza.  
  
"It seemed like they made a mistake I only see something like...I don't know. Hambergure and some huge chunk of....meat. It tastes like...some kind of meat I never tasted before.  
  
The woman blinked over to her family, taking the pizza into her hand and glanced at the topping. He's right. No Pinapple, no ham...just these meat in a small chunk of stake. And this huge blob of other meat with little dots on it, like tongue of...tongue of madness.  
  
"Do you want me to call them again?" she asked, placing the pizza down.  
  
"Naw. It's okay. We already chewed on some, anyway," said he, munching away. 


End file.
